Sunday, August 31, 2008
Do What You Do Best
Many of us suffer from a fear that what we do best isn't enough to make a significant difference. It's a condition similar to thinking the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence but on an exquisitely personal level. "If only I could be a writer. Then I could influence large groups of people", "Gee, I wish I was a doctor - then I could really help people", "Boy, I could really change things if I were the CEO." And on and on it goes. But the reality is that you can use the skills you have - no matter what they are - to bring about profound changes. There is a story in the Judeo-Christian tradition that speaks eloquently of this.
The Philistines had gathered their forces to do battle with the Israelites. Each army was gathered on a hill on the opposite side of a valley. The hero of the Philistines came into the valley each morning to taunt the Israelites. He was a huge man, standing 9 feet tall and wearing scale armor that weighed over 125 pounds. He challenged the Israelites to send one man down into the valley to fight him. The winner would claim the army of the defeated man as slaves.
The Israelites were afraid not only because this guy was intimidating, but also because they knew they were at a great disadvantage technologically. The Philistines had learned how to use iron to fashion weapons and the Israelites had not. That would be comparable today to an army using WWI technology to face a force with nuclear abilities.
Finally a small boy - about 14 years old - approached Saul, the commander of the Israelites, and convinced him to let him do battle with the giant. Saul reluctantly agreed but insisted that the boy wear his coat of armor and helmet into the battle. The boy, however, refused saying, "I can't go in these because I'm not used to them." Instead, he wore his simple cloth tunic and went into a stream bed to pick up five smooth stones to use with his sling.
As he descended into the valley, the giant began to mock and curse him. "Come close so that I can feed your flesh to the beasts of the field and the birds of the sky." Instead of being intimidated, the boy charged the giant, placed a stone into his sling and flung it into the warrior's forehead dropping him on the spot. Running to the giant's body, the small boy grabbed his sword, killed him and cut off his head. The Philistine army scattered and ran but was pursued and cut down by the Israelites.
As you've probably guessed by now, this is the story of David and Goliath. This amazing victory wasn't gained by superior technology. Not was it achieved by greater intellect. It was accomplished because someone applied a simple skill to a situation where it could be used to advantage. David was a shepherd who had honed his talent with a sling in order to protect his flocks from attack. When the opportunity presented itself, he applied his skill and changed the course of an encounter that affected thousands upon thousands of people.
I think it's important to note in this story that David didn't try to be someone he wasn't. He was offered Saul's armor, but he refused saying, "I'm not used to them." He went into the challenge as the simple shepherd that he was. Not as someone who felt he needed an advantage that could be obtained by using something else to prop him up.
The Universe builds talents and skills into people that are designed to be used in their lives. And these gifts, both those that are "hardwired" in and those that are only developed through hard work, are many and diverse. We would do well to remember that it was not a genius, a king, or a gifted warrior that slew the giant. It was a simple shepherd boy who applied his gift.
The Philistines had gathered their forces to do battle with the Israelites. Each army was gathered on a hill on the opposite side of a valley. The hero of the Philistines came into the valley each morning to taunt the Israelites. He was a huge man, standing 9 feet tall and wearing scale armor that weighed over 125 pounds. He challenged the Israelites to send one man down into the valley to fight him. The winner would claim the army of the defeated man as slaves.
The Israelites were afraid not only because this guy was intimidating, but also because they knew they were at a great disadvantage technologically. The Philistines had learned how to use iron to fashion weapons and the Israelites had not. That would be comparable today to an army using WWI technology to face a force with nuclear abilities.
Finally a small boy - about 14 years old - approached Saul, the commander of the Israelites, and convinced him to let him do battle with the giant. Saul reluctantly agreed but insisted that the boy wear his coat of armor and helmet into the battle. The boy, however, refused saying, "I can't go in these because I'm not used to them." Instead, he wore his simple cloth tunic and went into a stream bed to pick up five smooth stones to use with his sling.
As he descended into the valley, the giant began to mock and curse him. "Come close so that I can feed your flesh to the beasts of the field and the birds of the sky." Instead of being intimidated, the boy charged the giant, placed a stone into his sling and flung it into the warrior's forehead dropping him on the spot. Running to the giant's body, the small boy grabbed his sword, killed him and cut off his head. The Philistine army scattered and ran but was pursued and cut down by the Israelites.
As you've probably guessed by now, this is the story of David and Goliath. This amazing victory wasn't gained by superior technology. Not was it achieved by greater intellect. It was accomplished because someone applied a simple skill to a situation where it could be used to advantage. David was a shepherd who had honed his talent with a sling in order to protect his flocks from attack. When the opportunity presented itself, he applied his skill and changed the course of an encounter that affected thousands upon thousands of people.
I think it's important to note in this story that David didn't try to be someone he wasn't. He was offered Saul's armor, but he refused saying, "I'm not used to them." He went into the challenge as the simple shepherd that he was. Not as someone who felt he needed an advantage that could be obtained by using something else to prop him up.
The Universe builds talents and skills into people that are designed to be used in their lives. And these gifts, both those that are "hardwired" in and those that are only developed through hard work, are many and diverse. We would do well to remember that it was not a genius, a king, or a gifted warrior that slew the giant. It was a simple shepherd boy who applied his gift.
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Seeing the Big Picture
The story goes that three men were observed working in a quarry. They were each approached and asked what they were doing. The first man replied, “I am cutting stone.” The second man replied, “I am carving a stone foundation for the base of a statue.” The third man replied, “I am building a cathedral.” All of these men were engaged in the same function. Only one of them grasped and felt proud of the larger concept and impact of their work and actions – that they were employed in the task of building a cathedral.
It’s very easy to limit our vision, particularly as it applies to our personal value and worth. I sometimes hear women say in response to the question, “What do you do?”, “Oh, I’m only a housewife.” And whenever I hear that statement I cringe. The impact of a caring, nurturing mother on the development of a family unit and children in particular is immeasurable. The examples are legion. Many people don’t feel that they possess value in their jobs, their homes or their relationships. But they are not seeing the larger picture.
Although the first and second quarrymen perceived their jobs as less important than others, suppose they were not available. Suppose that no quarrymen could be found or that they were unavailable for work. The architects and engineers would simply not be able to build the cathedral. It would remain a dream – simple plans drawn on paper. It would never achieve three dimensional reality.
Consider the woman who is “only” a housewife. What if she were unavailable to provide a stable and loving influence in her home? Like Jimmy Stewart discovered in “It’s a Wonderful Life”, the influence of one person can ripple out in a magnified effect to an entire community. I am not saying that women should not work outside the home, but rather that women or men who choose to stay exclusively in a role within the home should not feel of less value than the person who chooses to work outside the home.
In our society, where bigger is often equated with better and where excitement and sophistication are glamorized, self-criticism and denigration comes easily. We are pressured to “achieve” and achievement is commonly associated with better education, higher paying jobs, more status within the community, a more expensive car, a larger house. We tend to view these things are external evidence of achievement.
But we often fail to realize that true achievement lies in things that cannot be measured and upon which no price can be placed. The love of your family toward you, your relationships with others, the child whose life you influenced acting as a Big Brother or Big Sister, the child you volunteered to tutor in elementary school.
To the quarrymen, I would say that you are not “just” cutting stone – you are building a cathedral. To the women and men who choose an exclusive role within their home I would say that you are not “Just housewives or househusbands – you are a societal engineer, building a better community through your loving and dedicated influence in the home.
When you begin to see things from this perspective, you are beginning to see the big picture.
It’s very easy to limit our vision, particularly as it applies to our personal value and worth. I sometimes hear women say in response to the question, “What do you do?”, “Oh, I’m only a housewife.” And whenever I hear that statement I cringe. The impact of a caring, nurturing mother on the development of a family unit and children in particular is immeasurable. The examples are legion. Many people don’t feel that they possess value in their jobs, their homes or their relationships. But they are not seeing the larger picture.
Although the first and second quarrymen perceived their jobs as less important than others, suppose they were not available. Suppose that no quarrymen could be found or that they were unavailable for work. The architects and engineers would simply not be able to build the cathedral. It would remain a dream – simple plans drawn on paper. It would never achieve three dimensional reality.
Consider the woman who is “only” a housewife. What if she were unavailable to provide a stable and loving influence in her home? Like Jimmy Stewart discovered in “It’s a Wonderful Life”, the influence of one person can ripple out in a magnified effect to an entire community. I am not saying that women should not work outside the home, but rather that women or men who choose to stay exclusively in a role within the home should not feel of less value than the person who chooses to work outside the home.
In our society, where bigger is often equated with better and where excitement and sophistication are glamorized, self-criticism and denigration comes easily. We are pressured to “achieve” and achievement is commonly associated with better education, higher paying jobs, more status within the community, a more expensive car, a larger house. We tend to view these things are external evidence of achievement.
But we often fail to realize that true achievement lies in things that cannot be measured and upon which no price can be placed. The love of your family toward you, your relationships with others, the child whose life you influenced acting as a Big Brother or Big Sister, the child you volunteered to tutor in elementary school.
To the quarrymen, I would say that you are not “just” cutting stone – you are building a cathedral. To the women and men who choose an exclusive role within their home I would say that you are not “Just housewives or househusbands – you are a societal engineer, building a better community through your loving and dedicated influence in the home.
When you begin to see things from this perspective, you are beginning to see the big picture.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
State Your Intention
Stating your intention is always the first step in accomplishing anything. In your personal life, stating your intention is like developing a very, very brief strategic plan. There is an old saying that if you don’t know where you’re going, you’re certain to get there. In other words, you’ll get nowhere quickly if you don’t develop a game plan.
Stating your intention focuses your attention on a specific issue, behavior or attitude. It reminds you that “this” is what you want to do today. It helps channel your thoughts much like the alignment of light waves creates a laser.
When you state your intention, you invite the Universe to help you in accomplishing your goal. This is a piece of what Christ meant when, in the Lords prayer he said, “Give us this day our daily bread.” In other words, teach us and help us to do what we need to do today.
Here’s how you do it. When you wake up in the morning, before you get out of bed and you’re still in that hazy state of awakening, very gently think about what attributes you want to demonstrate during the coming day. Don’t try to force it. Just let your mind drift in that direction. When you’re not quite fully awake, there’s less of a chance that your analytical mind or ego will wrest control of your thinking and try to “force” a specific direction on you. When you are in-between sleep and full wakefulness, your mental state is less defined and more malleable to impressions of the spirit.
Certain words or short phrases may come to mind. They represent the attitudes or attributes that would best serve your needs during the day. They may be issues you need to work on or outlooks that would help you deal with certain situations. When you settle on something, insert it into the following sentence. “I want to be (blank) today.”
Some possibilities are flexible, attuned to others needs, forgiving, confident, decisive, diplomatic, good-natured, level-headed, understanding, helpful or open-minded. But there’s an almost endless list of others.
Then simply fix the completed statement in your head by repeating it several times and letting it sink into your consciousness. Remind yourself of the statement a few times throughout the day.
Something interesting often happens when you do this little exercise. You will find that circumstances arise wherein you will need to exhibit the very attributes that you selected. For example, if you chose “flexible”, your plans may have to suddenly be altered. If you chose “decisive” you may be called upon unexpectedly to make an important decision. If you chose “level-headed” you may need to mediate a conflict.
It may also be that you receive an impression to select a word that describes something that you need to work on in your life. If you chose “good-natured” it may be the Universes’ way of suggesting that you need to lighten up a bit. If you chose “helpful” it may be that you need to become more aware of the needs of those around you and to put a little less emphasis on yourself.
The advantage to this practice is that it greatly accelerates your development. You will probably notice themes among the words you select. The themes will be opposite of the words you choose. In other words, the words you select are designed to help you deal with the issues in your life that you need to work on. Some examples of themes might be self-centeredness, fear, selfishness, hard-heartedness, indecisiveness or a lack of tact. You will make much more progress in addressing these themes by focusing on them in a positive way by using this technique on a daily basis.
Stating your intention focuses your attention on a specific issue, behavior or attitude. It reminds you that “this” is what you want to do today. It helps channel your thoughts much like the alignment of light waves creates a laser.
When you state your intention, you invite the Universe to help you in accomplishing your goal. This is a piece of what Christ meant when, in the Lords prayer he said, “Give us this day our daily bread.” In other words, teach us and help us to do what we need to do today.
Here’s how you do it. When you wake up in the morning, before you get out of bed and you’re still in that hazy state of awakening, very gently think about what attributes you want to demonstrate during the coming day. Don’t try to force it. Just let your mind drift in that direction. When you’re not quite fully awake, there’s less of a chance that your analytical mind or ego will wrest control of your thinking and try to “force” a specific direction on you. When you are in-between sleep and full wakefulness, your mental state is less defined and more malleable to impressions of the spirit.
Certain words or short phrases may come to mind. They represent the attitudes or attributes that would best serve your needs during the day. They may be issues you need to work on or outlooks that would help you deal with certain situations. When you settle on something, insert it into the following sentence. “I want to be (blank) today.”
Some possibilities are flexible, attuned to others needs, forgiving, confident, decisive, diplomatic, good-natured, level-headed, understanding, helpful or open-minded. But there’s an almost endless list of others.
Then simply fix the completed statement in your head by repeating it several times and letting it sink into your consciousness. Remind yourself of the statement a few times throughout the day.
Something interesting often happens when you do this little exercise. You will find that circumstances arise wherein you will need to exhibit the very attributes that you selected. For example, if you chose “flexible”, your plans may have to suddenly be altered. If you chose “decisive” you may be called upon unexpectedly to make an important decision. If you chose “level-headed” you may need to mediate a conflict.
It may also be that you receive an impression to select a word that describes something that you need to work on in your life. If you chose “good-natured” it may be the Universes’ way of suggesting that you need to lighten up a bit. If you chose “helpful” it may be that you need to become more aware of the needs of those around you and to put a little less emphasis on yourself.
The advantage to this practice is that it greatly accelerates your development. You will probably notice themes among the words you select. The themes will be opposite of the words you choose. In other words, the words you select are designed to help you deal with the issues in your life that you need to work on. Some examples of themes might be self-centeredness, fear, selfishness, hard-heartedness, indecisiveness or a lack of tact. You will make much more progress in addressing these themes by focusing on them in a positive way by using this technique on a daily basis.
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Changing Your Mind
A few years before my mother passed away, I shared a quiet Christmas with her ... one in which we deliberately tried to scale back the pace, relax a little and savor the moments instead of rushing headlong through them on our way to December 26th. Nevertheless, we didn't escape the rigors of the season unscathed. The day after Christmas, most of our family suffered the nauseating, head pounding, ache causing, stomach churning somersaults of the flu. It was the kind that made you feel like you were going to die, but afraid you weren't. One of my cousins actually visited the local Emergency department. Most of the rest of us just wish we had.
After I'd sufficiently recovered so that I could hold a telephone, I called my mom to see how she was doing. Quite predictably, as perhaps any sane person would have, she commented how terrible the entire episode had been. And I agreed with her - which thrust us into a conversation about how bad we had felt, who won the prize for the most trips to the bathroom and how unfair it was for me to be hit with the flu right after Christmas day and during my hard-earned vacation.
Then, very unexpectedly, our conversation seemed to be put on hold. Time was somehow suspended - almost like they do in the movies when they stop the storyline and the character thinks back to a part of his childhood. And a small voice inside began to counsel me. I realized that my mom's response to the entire situation and my response to my mom's response were 1) all based on learned behavior, 2) were intangible occurrences and 3) were only our opinions of the truth. And that held some possibilities.
First, all our actions are based on learned behaviors. That means that they may or may not be appropriate responses for any given situation. What if the person we learned those behaviors/responses from learned them from someone who had difficulty handling life? In that case, we are simply passing down inappropriate response mechanisms and attitudes over the generations. Small bumps on the road of life can be made to seem mountains if we allow them. But it is possible to keep perspective.
Second, our response patterns and attitudes are completely intangible occurrences. We are not hard-wired computers that restrict our responses to certain patterns. It is true that our behaviors and attitudes tend to follow certain patterns because that's how we learned to respond. But, unlike machines who possess no capacity for innovation, we are quite capable of learning new beliefs, attitudes, responses and ways of living. Our attitudes can be changed in the twinkling of an eye if we choose. It is a matter of choice. There is nothing in our physiological make-up that prevents us from changing any of our views.
Third, most of the time the way that we view a situation is based on our opinion of the truth - not the truth itself. Given any situation, any three people will view it in a slightly different light. Where then is the truth? Frequently we view the truth as being contained in our viewpoint. But the other two people in the triangle also feel the same way. So, two important rules for sane living could be 1) learn to be more accepting of the viewpoints of others and 2) learn to see your viewpoint as your opinion, not as the unequivocal truth.
So, how could the conversation between my mom and I have turned out? "Well mom, how are you doing?" "Just fine, Jim. That flue is some nasty stuff but nothing a little rest, some fluids and family support can't take care of! Too bad you had to come down with it on your vacation." "No problem. I stayed in bed, watched a little TV and caught up on some reading."
Attitudes are intangibles. There is nothing in our make-up that says we have to have or keep a given attitude. It's our choice. We can change our minds at any given time.
After I'd sufficiently recovered so that I could hold a telephone, I called my mom to see how she was doing. Quite predictably, as perhaps any sane person would have, she commented how terrible the entire episode had been. And I agreed with her - which thrust us into a conversation about how bad we had felt, who won the prize for the most trips to the bathroom and how unfair it was for me to be hit with the flu right after Christmas day and during my hard-earned vacation.
Then, very unexpectedly, our conversation seemed to be put on hold. Time was somehow suspended - almost like they do in the movies when they stop the storyline and the character thinks back to a part of his childhood. And a small voice inside began to counsel me. I realized that my mom's response to the entire situation and my response to my mom's response were 1) all based on learned behavior, 2) were intangible occurrences and 3) were only our opinions of the truth. And that held some possibilities.
First, all our actions are based on learned behaviors. That means that they may or may not be appropriate responses for any given situation. What if the person we learned those behaviors/responses from learned them from someone who had difficulty handling life? In that case, we are simply passing down inappropriate response mechanisms and attitudes over the generations. Small bumps on the road of life can be made to seem mountains if we allow them. But it is possible to keep perspective.
Second, our response patterns and attitudes are completely intangible occurrences. We are not hard-wired computers that restrict our responses to certain patterns. It is true that our behaviors and attitudes tend to follow certain patterns because that's how we learned to respond. But, unlike machines who possess no capacity for innovation, we are quite capable of learning new beliefs, attitudes, responses and ways of living. Our attitudes can be changed in the twinkling of an eye if we choose. It is a matter of choice. There is nothing in our physiological make-up that prevents us from changing any of our views.
Third, most of the time the way that we view a situation is based on our opinion of the truth - not the truth itself. Given any situation, any three people will view it in a slightly different light. Where then is the truth? Frequently we view the truth as being contained in our viewpoint. But the other two people in the triangle also feel the same way. So, two important rules for sane living could be 1) learn to be more accepting of the viewpoints of others and 2) learn to see your viewpoint as your opinion, not as the unequivocal truth.
So, how could the conversation between my mom and I have turned out? "Well mom, how are you doing?" "Just fine, Jim. That flue is some nasty stuff but nothing a little rest, some fluids and family support can't take care of! Too bad you had to come down with it on your vacation." "No problem. I stayed in bed, watched a little TV and caught up on some reading."
Attitudes are intangibles. There is nothing in our make-up that says we have to have or keep a given attitude. It's our choice. We can change our minds at any given time.
Thursday, August 21, 2008
Forgiveness
Have you ever noticed how people tend to take a concept like forgiveness and try to mold it into a black and white issue from which they justify their stances? A “forgiveness purist” might say that you have to forgive everyone for anything and everything they do – no questions asked, no strings attached. A “forgiveness pragmatist” might say that forgiveness is linked to repentance and at least some level of commitment by the forgiven to change their behavior.
Where does the truth lie? Probably somewhere in between. At least, that’s as close as I can come to a good answer.
I clicked on MSN yesterday and saw a news article whose headline read something like “The 20 Greatest Hypocrites of Our Time.” It listed people like Elliott Spitzer, New York’s aggressive attorney general, who was hard on vice as a prosecutor but who, himself, was identified as a “john” in a prostitution ring. And Rush Limbaugh who has publicly stated that people who used illicit drugs should be prosecuted and locked up, but who allegedly “doctor shopped” to feed an addiction to prescription pain killers.
The whole article, although true in its reporting of the facts, had a very negative overtone to it. There wasn’t any point to it except to identify hypocritical behaviors of highly public figures. There was no moral lesson. There was no effort to convey a warning like “power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely.” There obviously was no attempt to say, “You know, anybody can find themselves in this kind of situation. And we’re all hypocrites to some degree. So, let’s not savage these folks … let’s learn from their pain.” It was very simply a barefaced act of public humiliation. That was it. Nothing more. And it left me with a very, very bad taste in my mouth.
Yes, we can all get a little shot of self-righteous adrenalin by looking at these kinds of situations, doing a comparison between them and us and patting ourselves on the back for being “so much better.” But the truth is, we aren’t. We’ve all screwed up. We’ve all made mistakes. We’ve all hurt people. We’ve all done things we regret.
As a species, humans have a very nasty tendency to rationalize away their own shortcomings while, at the same time, magnifying others weaknesses. It’s largely a psychologically-based, ego-driven attempt to make us feel superior. But we should all wonder what price we pay for it.
Jesus delivered his message in parables to the crowds and was much more specific in his teachings to his closest disciples. But we can be assured that, although the teachings were somewhat different in delivery and content, there was alignment in message.
When people of a small community surrounded a prostitute and were ready to stone her, Jesus crouched down and drew descriptions of their own sins in the sand. Then, looking up, he said, “Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.” On another occasion, someone in some degree of exasperation asked him how many times they had to forgive someone ... seven times? His reply was “… not seven … but seven times seventy.” In at least one instance he said, “If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn your other to him.” A different time, he forgave a person and advised him to “ … sin no more.” Finally, while hanging on the cross, he uttered the famous words, “Father forgive them, for they know not what they do.”
I’m certainly not in a position to be so self-righteous as to try to hold people to a rigid, purist stance on forgiveness. Frankly, I think it’s beyond my abilities right now to forgive people for certain acts. Pre-meditated murder, child abuse, mistreatment of the elderly and infirmed … all come to mind as only a few of many, many examples. But, in the absolute highest spiritual sense, I realize that I lose a little piece of me by not being able to do so. And I know that we all have done things that people might not have completely forgiven us for … acts perhaps smaller than capital crimes, but certainly painful to others nonetheless … and when that happens, it holds us hostage. It’s difficult to move forward. It’s hard to get beyond the pain. The act of unforgiveness blocks healing. It hurts … and it keeps on hurting.
It’s a bit scary to try to paraphrase Jesus on forgiveness … or anything else. But I’m going to attempt it here. “Look … everybody has made mistakes. Some small with limited impact. Some larger with more significant impact. But nobody is guiltless or blameless. And, without actually experiencing the cumulative results of what another person has experienced in their life, it’s impossible for you to know what motivated them to do what they did. So, when somebody offends you, you can choose to hold onto it. Or you can choose to forgive and let it go. Forgiving can be tough. But it’s a higher road. And, although there aren’t any guarantees, it can result in repaired relationships, better health and a more productive future. Think of it like this … what I’ve said about forgiveness is like a teacher telling a student what he needs to do to get an 'A' in an assignment. It’s the highest road you can possibly take. If you don’t do it all the time or aren’t able to do it all under certain extreme circumstances, it doesn’t mean you don’t 'pass the course.' If you can’t do it at all, however, or do it on a very limited basis, you’re going to have a very difficult time in life. So, at least try to soften the walls a bit.”
Having experienced all aspects of the forgiveness equation from both sides including being forgiven and unforgiven and extending and withholding forgiveness, that seems like pretty good advice.
Where does the truth lie? Probably somewhere in between. At least, that’s as close as I can come to a good answer.
I clicked on MSN yesterday and saw a news article whose headline read something like “The 20 Greatest Hypocrites of Our Time.” It listed people like Elliott Spitzer, New York’s aggressive attorney general, who was hard on vice as a prosecutor but who, himself, was identified as a “john” in a prostitution ring. And Rush Limbaugh who has publicly stated that people who used illicit drugs should be prosecuted and locked up, but who allegedly “doctor shopped” to feed an addiction to prescription pain killers.
The whole article, although true in its reporting of the facts, had a very negative overtone to it. There wasn’t any point to it except to identify hypocritical behaviors of highly public figures. There was no moral lesson. There was no effort to convey a warning like “power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely.” There obviously was no attempt to say, “You know, anybody can find themselves in this kind of situation. And we’re all hypocrites to some degree. So, let’s not savage these folks … let’s learn from their pain.” It was very simply a barefaced act of public humiliation. That was it. Nothing more. And it left me with a very, very bad taste in my mouth.
Yes, we can all get a little shot of self-righteous adrenalin by looking at these kinds of situations, doing a comparison between them and us and patting ourselves on the back for being “so much better.” But the truth is, we aren’t. We’ve all screwed up. We’ve all made mistakes. We’ve all hurt people. We’ve all done things we regret.
As a species, humans have a very nasty tendency to rationalize away their own shortcomings while, at the same time, magnifying others weaknesses. It’s largely a psychologically-based, ego-driven attempt to make us feel superior. But we should all wonder what price we pay for it.
Jesus delivered his message in parables to the crowds and was much more specific in his teachings to his closest disciples. But we can be assured that, although the teachings were somewhat different in delivery and content, there was alignment in message.
When people of a small community surrounded a prostitute and were ready to stone her, Jesus crouched down and drew descriptions of their own sins in the sand. Then, looking up, he said, “Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.” On another occasion, someone in some degree of exasperation asked him how many times they had to forgive someone ... seven times? His reply was “… not seven … but seven times seventy.” In at least one instance he said, “If someone strikes you on the right cheek, turn your other to him.” A different time, he forgave a person and advised him to “ … sin no more.” Finally, while hanging on the cross, he uttered the famous words, “Father forgive them, for they know not what they do.”
I’m certainly not in a position to be so self-righteous as to try to hold people to a rigid, purist stance on forgiveness. Frankly, I think it’s beyond my abilities right now to forgive people for certain acts. Pre-meditated murder, child abuse, mistreatment of the elderly and infirmed … all come to mind as only a few of many, many examples. But, in the absolute highest spiritual sense, I realize that I lose a little piece of me by not being able to do so. And I know that we all have done things that people might not have completely forgiven us for … acts perhaps smaller than capital crimes, but certainly painful to others nonetheless … and when that happens, it holds us hostage. It’s difficult to move forward. It’s hard to get beyond the pain. The act of unforgiveness blocks healing. It hurts … and it keeps on hurting.
It’s a bit scary to try to paraphrase Jesus on forgiveness … or anything else. But I’m going to attempt it here. “Look … everybody has made mistakes. Some small with limited impact. Some larger with more significant impact. But nobody is guiltless or blameless. And, without actually experiencing the cumulative results of what another person has experienced in their life, it’s impossible for you to know what motivated them to do what they did. So, when somebody offends you, you can choose to hold onto it. Or you can choose to forgive and let it go. Forgiving can be tough. But it’s a higher road. And, although there aren’t any guarantees, it can result in repaired relationships, better health and a more productive future. Think of it like this … what I’ve said about forgiveness is like a teacher telling a student what he needs to do to get an 'A' in an assignment. It’s the highest road you can possibly take. If you don’t do it all the time or aren’t able to do it all under certain extreme circumstances, it doesn’t mean you don’t 'pass the course.' If you can’t do it at all, however, or do it on a very limited basis, you’re going to have a very difficult time in life. So, at least try to soften the walls a bit.”
Having experienced all aspects of the forgiveness equation from both sides including being forgiven and unforgiven and extending and withholding forgiveness, that seems like pretty good advice.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
But there are no shortcuts ...
We live on a fallen planet. The setting is difficult. The ability to identify and choose between good and evil, light and darkness, is both a learning opportunity and a problem generator. Free agency has resulted in an environment wherein we are faced with many difficulties, most of which we have caused ourselves. The heaviness of a third dimensional atmosphere where there are lags between intention and results often complicates our difficulties. We reap what we sow and identifying and correcting issues that we ourselves have created is more often than not a laborious and difficult effort. We cannot snap our fingers and have our problems disappear. There are no shortcuts. Most of the time we simply have to slog through the swamp.
Much of our planets population and Americans in particular are addicted to quick fixes. We’re constantly looking for ways to avoid the natural consequences of our actions and the results of our poor decisions. We want the easy way out … the smooth and level road … the bed of roses.
A lot of folks seek this kind of quick relief in religion. In recent decades, there have been many Christian “television evangelists” who have encouraged people to give money to their causes while assuring the givers that God would reward them with riches if they did so. Others have promised miraculous healings. Many of these “spiritual leaders” who have promised these types of quick fixes have been exposed as shams. Some have gone to prison for defrauding contributors and misappropriating funds.
Some “healers” and “intuitives” have been found to be wearing small receivers in their ears and getting information from staff members about the people whom “God has told them to pick” out of the audience. Others have salted the audience with people who will cooperate with them in their “healing.” I believe that genuine healings do occur. I have witnessed some and I have participated in some. But to believe that they will unerringly occur if you will only follow a certain procedure or come to a certain “healer” is nonsense.
Some people use magic in an attempt to change their circumstances. And I believe that magic can help to some degree in some situations. But it isn’t like Cinderella where the fairy godmothers use a wave of their wands to change some mice and a pumpkin into a beautiful horse-drawn carriage.
In stressful times like ours, it’s human nature to hope for a quick fix. Financial stresses, familial pressures, relationship crises, workplace tension, international conflict, health issues all take their tolls. But, although Jesus often healed the sick and gave hope to the troubled, he also said that “in this life you will have tribulation.”
Over the course of my life, I have somewhat grudgingly come to believe that there are no quick fixes … no easy way out … no rainbow road to solving our problems. And I don’t believe that’s being pessimistic. I believe it’s being pragmatic. Christ’s disciples were killed for following him. Good people throughout the ages have suffered in countless ways. God did not intervene to stop WWI or WWII. He did not intercede to prevent the Holocaust or the Inquisition. Hurricanes, earthquakes, tornadoes, floods and other natural disasters kill people every day. We cannot count on God to bail us out of these kinds of situations. That is not how this world works.
Do I believe in angelic intervention? Yes … under certain circumstances. I’ve been involved in angelic encounters. But it isn’t something I’d count on to prevent a war or repair a relationship or feed a multitude of starving people. Do I believe God helps us … even to the point of occasionally interceding in situations? Yes … under certain circumstances. But dramatic rescues seem to be the exception rather than the rule. If sought out, God will provide guidance and encouragement. But S/he will not do the work that we ourselves can do.
Because I’m human and am also prone to wanting quick fixes for certain situations I’m faced with, I don’t particularly like these rules. There are times I wish God would stretch the parameters a bit and intervene in a more direct and powerful way. There are issues that I can’t understand … can’t get my arms around … don’t know how to address … and I grow frustrated with God for not fixing them. I would do the work if I knew how. I just don’t know what to do.
But there’s such a thing as knocking your head against a tree. The tree isn’t going to give … but your head might. In the same way, you can’t “break” God’s laws … they don’t break or bend. They are fixed. And they are fixed for a reason. But you can break yourself against those laws. So it doesn’t do much good to thrash around in irritation. It only wears you out.
Yes, because I’m a “fixer” … a trait that’s genetically hardwired into most males … I can get very frustrated with things I can’t figure out or fix. And, believe me, I’m facing a lot of those situations right now. On the other hand, it doesn’t do much good for me to foment over the fact that there’s no easy way out on the horizon.
Sometimes, the best you can do is to take a deep breath, try to gather yourself and take another step forward in the swamp.
Much of our planets population and Americans in particular are addicted to quick fixes. We’re constantly looking for ways to avoid the natural consequences of our actions and the results of our poor decisions. We want the easy way out … the smooth and level road … the bed of roses.
A lot of folks seek this kind of quick relief in religion. In recent decades, there have been many Christian “television evangelists” who have encouraged people to give money to their causes while assuring the givers that God would reward them with riches if they did so. Others have promised miraculous healings. Many of these “spiritual leaders” who have promised these types of quick fixes have been exposed as shams. Some have gone to prison for defrauding contributors and misappropriating funds.
Some “healers” and “intuitives” have been found to be wearing small receivers in their ears and getting information from staff members about the people whom “God has told them to pick” out of the audience. Others have salted the audience with people who will cooperate with them in their “healing.” I believe that genuine healings do occur. I have witnessed some and I have participated in some. But to believe that they will unerringly occur if you will only follow a certain procedure or come to a certain “healer” is nonsense.
Some people use magic in an attempt to change their circumstances. And I believe that magic can help to some degree in some situations. But it isn’t like Cinderella where the fairy godmothers use a wave of their wands to change some mice and a pumpkin into a beautiful horse-drawn carriage.
In stressful times like ours, it’s human nature to hope for a quick fix. Financial stresses, familial pressures, relationship crises, workplace tension, international conflict, health issues all take their tolls. But, although Jesus often healed the sick and gave hope to the troubled, he also said that “in this life you will have tribulation.”
Over the course of my life, I have somewhat grudgingly come to believe that there are no quick fixes … no easy way out … no rainbow road to solving our problems. And I don’t believe that’s being pessimistic. I believe it’s being pragmatic. Christ’s disciples were killed for following him. Good people throughout the ages have suffered in countless ways. God did not intervene to stop WWI or WWII. He did not intercede to prevent the Holocaust or the Inquisition. Hurricanes, earthquakes, tornadoes, floods and other natural disasters kill people every day. We cannot count on God to bail us out of these kinds of situations. That is not how this world works.
Do I believe in angelic intervention? Yes … under certain circumstances. I’ve been involved in angelic encounters. But it isn’t something I’d count on to prevent a war or repair a relationship or feed a multitude of starving people. Do I believe God helps us … even to the point of occasionally interceding in situations? Yes … under certain circumstances. But dramatic rescues seem to be the exception rather than the rule. If sought out, God will provide guidance and encouragement. But S/he will not do the work that we ourselves can do.
Because I’m human and am also prone to wanting quick fixes for certain situations I’m faced with, I don’t particularly like these rules. There are times I wish God would stretch the parameters a bit and intervene in a more direct and powerful way. There are issues that I can’t understand … can’t get my arms around … don’t know how to address … and I grow frustrated with God for not fixing them. I would do the work if I knew how. I just don’t know what to do.
But there’s such a thing as knocking your head against a tree. The tree isn’t going to give … but your head might. In the same way, you can’t “break” God’s laws … they don’t break or bend. They are fixed. And they are fixed for a reason. But you can break yourself against those laws. So it doesn’t do much good to thrash around in irritation. It only wears you out.
Yes, because I’m a “fixer” … a trait that’s genetically hardwired into most males … I can get very frustrated with things I can’t figure out or fix. And, believe me, I’m facing a lot of those situations right now. On the other hand, it doesn’t do much good for me to foment over the fact that there’s no easy way out on the horizon.
Sometimes, the best you can do is to take a deep breath, try to gather yourself and take another step forward in the swamp.
Monday, August 18, 2008
The Future of the World Depends on Us
As I write these words, half the planet is in danger of social instability because of escalating food and energy prices, lack of potable water, deteriorating governments, and pollution.
Over 100 countries are skirting the edge of bedlam. More than 45 countries, with a population of 2.7 billion people, are in danger of armed conflict due primarily to inadequate natural resources. Another 1.2 billion people scattered over 56 countries are threatened with severe social instability of various sorts.
At present, there are 14 wars raging across the planet. Thirty-seven countries are experiencing a food crisis because of expanding demand, diminishing supplies, soaring energy prices and global grain stocks that are at 25-year lows. Almost three billion people worldwide are forced to survive on less than $2 a day.
Elevated levels of poverty have resulted in 40 new diseases, 1,100 epidemics over the past five years, and a record 20 drug-resistant disease strains today. Additionally, old diseases like cholera and yellow fever are regaining footholds. And more than one-third of childhood deaths come about in the first 28 days of life, typically because of a lack of clean, drinkable water. 700 million people currently face water shortages.
Our planet’s population will require 50% more food in the next five years and 100% more in 2030. Worldwide energy requirements could double in only 20 years. Most studies estimate that there are over 20,000 active nuclear weapons on the planet and there have been about 150 reports of use of unauthorized nuclear materials per year over the past three years.
The year 2012 is approaching. We are coming to a tipping point where the results of our decisions will fall on us much more quickly than they have in the past. Our planet’s population needs to rethink its priorities if we hope to prevent these trends from overwhelming us. So, is there any good news out there? Fortunately, there is.
Some governments are now beginning to become more cognizant of the global issues we face. And, they are starting to share their expertise more consistently within the framework of international workgroups that are designed to address crises.
Super computers are now approaching abilities that will help solve problems at exponentially quicker rates. Floating point operations in the realm of 1.144 thousand trillion per second are now possible. This supports the capability to solve extremely difficult social, environmental, medical, and economic problems and may permit more dependable forecasting of future behavior and cause and effect interactions across a wide variety of fields.
Expanding Internet development is promoting a type of global "collective intelligence." This improved global interaction and exchange of ideas will help hasten the development of solutions for the problems we face. (Thanks to Larry Edelson for his research on these issues).
The cause is not lost. The world is not doomed. But we don’t have all the time that we would like to change these trends. The time to act is now. What does that mean for you? How will you respond? The future of the world depends on us.
Over 100 countries are skirting the edge of bedlam. More than 45 countries, with a population of 2.7 billion people, are in danger of armed conflict due primarily to inadequate natural resources. Another 1.2 billion people scattered over 56 countries are threatened with severe social instability of various sorts.
At present, there are 14 wars raging across the planet. Thirty-seven countries are experiencing a food crisis because of expanding demand, diminishing supplies, soaring energy prices and global grain stocks that are at 25-year lows. Almost three billion people worldwide are forced to survive on less than $2 a day.
Elevated levels of poverty have resulted in 40 new diseases, 1,100 epidemics over the past five years, and a record 20 drug-resistant disease strains today. Additionally, old diseases like cholera and yellow fever are regaining footholds. And more than one-third of childhood deaths come about in the first 28 days of life, typically because of a lack of clean, drinkable water. 700 million people currently face water shortages.
Our planet’s population will require 50% more food in the next five years and 100% more in 2030. Worldwide energy requirements could double in only 20 years. Most studies estimate that there are over 20,000 active nuclear weapons on the planet and there have been about 150 reports of use of unauthorized nuclear materials per year over the past three years.
The year 2012 is approaching. We are coming to a tipping point where the results of our decisions will fall on us much more quickly than they have in the past. Our planet’s population needs to rethink its priorities if we hope to prevent these trends from overwhelming us. So, is there any good news out there? Fortunately, there is.
Some governments are now beginning to become more cognizant of the global issues we face. And, they are starting to share their expertise more consistently within the framework of international workgroups that are designed to address crises.
Super computers are now approaching abilities that will help solve problems at exponentially quicker rates. Floating point operations in the realm of 1.144 thousand trillion per second are now possible. This supports the capability to solve extremely difficult social, environmental, medical, and economic problems and may permit more dependable forecasting of future behavior and cause and effect interactions across a wide variety of fields.
Expanding Internet development is promoting a type of global "collective intelligence." This improved global interaction and exchange of ideas will help hasten the development of solutions for the problems we face. (Thanks to Larry Edelson for his research on these issues).
The cause is not lost. The world is not doomed. But we don’t have all the time that we would like to change these trends. The time to act is now. What does that mean for you? How will you respond? The future of the world depends on us.
Monday, August 11, 2008
Does God ever "Get Down?!"
When I was in my late teens and early twenties (and my hair was down to my shoulders), my best friend and I wrote a lot of music together. We both had Epiphone 12-string guitars and a penchant for music the likes of that written by James Taylor, Dan Fogelberg, Simon and Garfunkel and such.
We would often play at different venues in and around our city … sometimes alone and sometimes with some other guys who shared our love for similar kinds of music. Usually, these were pretty “up” events. If we played something like “59th Bridge Street Song” by Simon and Garfunkel, people would be smiling, laughing, tapping their feet and singing along. When we played more thoughtful songs, like Fire and Rain by James Taylor, they’d quiet down and perhaps hum along. But they always seemed to move with the types of songs we played.
One night, however, sticks out in my mind. We had a repertoire of “Christian” songs that we would play for church groups when asked. They weren’t the old stand-by’s like “The Old Rugged Cross.” They were more in the line of folk-soft rock. I guess, in a way, we were some of the early forerunners of the current contemporary Christian music movement.
Jon and I had been asked by a pastor to play at a fairly large local church one evening. We arrived, set up, and opened the show before a large crowd at about 7pm. During our first number, I remember looking out at the audience and wondering what was happening. They were completely unmoved. Faces were expressionless. No smiles. No humming along (that I could tell). Nothing that would suggest that these people were enjoying themselves even in the least bit. And it wasn’t just the first song. We played the entire set without seeing one smile. And I don’t think it was because we were terrible! It was the same set we’d played many times before to people singing along, smiling, laughing, clapping.
I really think part of it was that we had the audacity to bring guitars into a church ... even though the pastor had invited us to help "loosen" the congregation up a bit. They had their own version of what a service should be like. Church music, after all, should be confined to an organ. Everybody knows that ... at least all of them.
Unfortunately, I think that’s the way a lot of Christians and other religious folks think God expects them to act. Not a lot of emotion. Not a lot of fun. Limited laughing. Can’t have much of a good time. Things have to be pretty subdued all the time.
But I have to say, that doesn’t hold much appeal to me. I’m not at all sure I’d like to go through eternity with that kind of approach to things. And, frankly, I have a hard time believing that’s what God expects … or that S\he’s like that.
Here’s what I read in the scriptures:
Praise the Lord with harp: sing unto him with the psaltery and an instrument of ten strings. (Psalms 33:2)
Praise him with the timbrel and dance: praise him with stringed instruments … (Psalms 150:4)
Let them praise his name in the dance. (Psalm 149:3)
There’s more examples. But you get my drift.
I think God’s exciting. I don’t think S\he’s a stick in the mud. I don’t think S\he wants us to go through eternity with a solemn face and a sullen spirit. Seems to me that would be pretty boring. Nothing against the people in that church that hot summer night when Jon and I were playing our hearts out … but I have a hard time imagining that a God who could create a universe like ours could want people to reflect the attitude and demeanor that we saw in that group that evening.
I think S\he's a lot bigger ... and a lot happier ... than that!
We would often play at different venues in and around our city … sometimes alone and sometimes with some other guys who shared our love for similar kinds of music. Usually, these were pretty “up” events. If we played something like “59th Bridge Street Song” by Simon and Garfunkel, people would be smiling, laughing, tapping their feet and singing along. When we played more thoughtful songs, like Fire and Rain by James Taylor, they’d quiet down and perhaps hum along. But they always seemed to move with the types of songs we played.
One night, however, sticks out in my mind. We had a repertoire of “Christian” songs that we would play for church groups when asked. They weren’t the old stand-by’s like “The Old Rugged Cross.” They were more in the line of folk-soft rock. I guess, in a way, we were some of the early forerunners of the current contemporary Christian music movement.
Jon and I had been asked by a pastor to play at a fairly large local church one evening. We arrived, set up, and opened the show before a large crowd at about 7pm. During our first number, I remember looking out at the audience and wondering what was happening. They were completely unmoved. Faces were expressionless. No smiles. No humming along (that I could tell). Nothing that would suggest that these people were enjoying themselves even in the least bit. And it wasn’t just the first song. We played the entire set without seeing one smile. And I don’t think it was because we were terrible! It was the same set we’d played many times before to people singing along, smiling, laughing, clapping.
I really think part of it was that we had the audacity to bring guitars into a church ... even though the pastor had invited us to help "loosen" the congregation up a bit. They had their own version of what a service should be like. Church music, after all, should be confined to an organ. Everybody knows that ... at least all of them.
Unfortunately, I think that’s the way a lot of Christians and other religious folks think God expects them to act. Not a lot of emotion. Not a lot of fun. Limited laughing. Can’t have much of a good time. Things have to be pretty subdued all the time.
But I have to say, that doesn’t hold much appeal to me. I’m not at all sure I’d like to go through eternity with that kind of approach to things. And, frankly, I have a hard time believing that’s what God expects … or that S\he’s like that.
Here’s what I read in the scriptures:
Praise the Lord with harp: sing unto him with the psaltery and an instrument of ten strings. (Psalms 33:2)
Praise him with the timbrel and dance: praise him with stringed instruments … (Psalms 150:4)
Let them praise his name in the dance. (Psalm 149:3)
There’s more examples. But you get my drift.
I think God’s exciting. I don’t think S\he’s a stick in the mud. I don’t think S\he wants us to go through eternity with a solemn face and a sullen spirit. Seems to me that would be pretty boring. Nothing against the people in that church that hot summer night when Jon and I were playing our hearts out … but I have a hard time imagining that a God who could create a universe like ours could want people to reflect the attitude and demeanor that we saw in that group that evening.
I think S\he's a lot bigger ... and a lot happier ... than that!
Sunday, August 10, 2008
Chaos
Note: I'm on vacation this week. Postings may not be as frequent as usual. Thanks for your readership.
The word "chaos" comes from the Greek word "tea" which means to gape or yawn. Chaos is also defined 1) as that confusion or confused mass out of which the universe was created and 2) as a scene of extreme confusion or disorder. These definitions have important meanings for all of us.
Chaos is an inevitable part of life, even though most people try to avoid it at all costs. It's uncomfortable because it threatens the status quo. It makes us examine our options. It brings to our attention the fact that all is not right. Its purpose is to make us aware that something is not as it should be and that it's time for change. It may also signal that we are not necessarily doing anything "wrong" in an ethical sense, but that it's time for us to shift gears and expand our consciousness and experience.
History is replete with examples ... take, for instance, last decade's war in the former Yugoslavia. Something was wrong there. The people were warring over differences in beliefs and arguing over land and resources. Instead of learning to live together in peace, they were trying to destroy each other. This isn't a condition particular only to that region or that war. Such is the case with most wars. The result is chaos - the warning that things need to be changed. Remember that chaos was the state of the universe prior to the act of creation. As it was then, it is now. Therefore, chaos always invites us to a new creation, whether at personal, corporate, national or global levels. The message is always the same ... only the scenery changes.
Chaos may also be telling us that nothing is necessarily wrong in a moral or ethical sense ... it may simply be the universe's way or urging us to expand our awareness and change paths. In high school, I decided that I wanted to be in law enforcement. I obtained my associates and bachelors in that area and, after I graduated, I worked for many years in the field. But, as time passed, I had the growing feeling that something wasn't "right" and that I was misplaced in my career. I chose to ignore the feeling until my life was suddenly thrust into chaos. Without boring you with the details, I'll tell you that it became clear to me that I needed to change paths in my life. Had it not been for that chaos, I would still be on the same path.
It's also interesting to note that chaos and chasm are brought forth from the same Greek root word. Joseph Campbell speaks of a Native American ritual for initiating a boy into manhood. The boy is spoken to by his elder mentor who tells him, "As you go the way of life, you will see a great chasm. Jump. It is not as wide as you think."
Chaos is the chasm we must be willing to jump if we are to get from "here" to "there" ... from status quo to a new creation. Much like pain is a symptom of something wrong in the physical body, chaos is the way that the universe uses to remind us or to make us aware that something is wrong in our individual or collective lives.
As difficult as it is, we must remember that chaos is not necessarily something evil or to be disdained and avoided. Certainly we should live our lives in such a way that we are in line with the purposes of the universe. In that sense, we should avoid chaos because we avoid the need for reminding. But if chaos does appear, it is better if we regard it as a close friend putting his arm around our shoulder and whispering in our ear that there is a better, higher way. For chaos can be considered the loving act of a universe that cares. When we see it, let us be like the young Native American who jumped the great chasm into a new creation, realizing that it wasn't as wide as he thought.
The word "chaos" comes from the Greek word "tea" which means to gape or yawn. Chaos is also defined 1) as that confusion or confused mass out of which the universe was created and 2) as a scene of extreme confusion or disorder. These definitions have important meanings for all of us.
Chaos is an inevitable part of life, even though most people try to avoid it at all costs. It's uncomfortable because it threatens the status quo. It makes us examine our options. It brings to our attention the fact that all is not right. Its purpose is to make us aware that something is not as it should be and that it's time for change. It may also signal that we are not necessarily doing anything "wrong" in an ethical sense, but that it's time for us to shift gears and expand our consciousness and experience.
History is replete with examples ... take, for instance, last decade's war in the former Yugoslavia. Something was wrong there. The people were warring over differences in beliefs and arguing over land and resources. Instead of learning to live together in peace, they were trying to destroy each other. This isn't a condition particular only to that region or that war. Such is the case with most wars. The result is chaos - the warning that things need to be changed. Remember that chaos was the state of the universe prior to the act of creation. As it was then, it is now. Therefore, chaos always invites us to a new creation, whether at personal, corporate, national or global levels. The message is always the same ... only the scenery changes.
Chaos may also be telling us that nothing is necessarily wrong in a moral or ethical sense ... it may simply be the universe's way or urging us to expand our awareness and change paths. In high school, I decided that I wanted to be in law enforcement. I obtained my associates and bachelors in that area and, after I graduated, I worked for many years in the field. But, as time passed, I had the growing feeling that something wasn't "right" and that I was misplaced in my career. I chose to ignore the feeling until my life was suddenly thrust into chaos. Without boring you with the details, I'll tell you that it became clear to me that I needed to change paths in my life. Had it not been for that chaos, I would still be on the same path.
It's also interesting to note that chaos and chasm are brought forth from the same Greek root word. Joseph Campbell speaks of a Native American ritual for initiating a boy into manhood. The boy is spoken to by his elder mentor who tells him, "As you go the way of life, you will see a great chasm. Jump. It is not as wide as you think."
Chaos is the chasm we must be willing to jump if we are to get from "here" to "there" ... from status quo to a new creation. Much like pain is a symptom of something wrong in the physical body, chaos is the way that the universe uses to remind us or to make us aware that something is wrong in our individual or collective lives.
As difficult as it is, we must remember that chaos is not necessarily something evil or to be disdained and avoided. Certainly we should live our lives in such a way that we are in line with the purposes of the universe. In that sense, we should avoid chaos because we avoid the need for reminding. But if chaos does appear, it is better if we regard it as a close friend putting his arm around our shoulder and whispering in our ear that there is a better, higher way. For chaos can be considered the loving act of a universe that cares. When we see it, let us be like the young Native American who jumped the great chasm into a new creation, realizing that it wasn't as wide as he thought.
Thursday, August 7, 2008
How do I find the answers?
I try to maintain a fairly healthy lifestyle. I eat right; I work out at the gym a few times a week. But let’s face it – none of us are perfect! I was looking for some nice salty, greasy potato chips in the pantry the other day. I had this sudden urge for chips and French onion dip. But despite the fact that I knew they were in the pantry, I couldn’t find them. I looked for several minutes until a friend who was over waltzed in, plucked the bag off the shelf from right in front of me and walked back out to watch the game on TV. The chips were sitting in a bag just below eye levels. But I wasn’t looking for them in a bag. I was looking for them in a cardboard tube … the kind with those plastic tops that stacks them nice and neat in an upright row. And because I wasn’t looking for them in a bag I didn’t see them even though they were only about 20 inches away from my face.
We’ve all gone through something similar to that when we buy a car. A friend of mine bought a Volvo a few years back. The car was on order for a while and during the time he was waiting for it to arrive, he began to notice how many Volvo’s were driving around town. Seemed like everywhere he went he noticed a Volvo. They were at stop signs, restaurant and mall parking lots, on the highways … they were everywhere. And indeed they were everywhere to him … because his mind was focused on them.
This phenomenon occurs because of a basic law of the universe … seek and you will find, knock and the door will be opened to you. When your mind is tilted in a certain direction you will begin to notice things that you never noticed before. You need to put your mind in a certain state in order to find answers to the questions you have. It’s like trying to find a particular station on the radio. You fiddle with the dial a little to find the right frequency. In essence, that’s what we need to do when we are looking for answers or searching for direction. We need to tune our minds to the right frequencies. When we achieve those frequencies we see answers and direction manifesting all around us.
But you need to know what you’re looking for. This involves making conscious decisions about what it is that you’re asking. Asking the question in the right way is as important as the act of asking itself. The universe, of course, can’t answer a question that isn’t asked. But, in the same light, you won’t recognize the answers that manifest around you unless you have asked the question in the right way. That’s because you will be looking for something different.
Sit down with pen and paper. Give some thought to something about which you wish some direction. Let’s take something many people struggle with at some time in their life … their educational goals … what is it they want to do with their life. If your grades are less than stellar, does it mean that you should pursue another course of study? Or does it mean that you need to learn perseverance? What is most needful for you to know at that time? You don’t want to pursue a goal that is not in line with your purpose and that will not be fulfilling to you. But neither do you want to produce grades below your capabilities. What is it that you need help with? Perhaps it’s with bringing clarity to the issue. It might be better to ask for help with that than to ask simply for help with better grades. All difficulties are solved one level higher than their manifestation. When you ask for answers, it may be a good idea to ask for clarity about the issue first.
Figure out what it really is that you want to know … what do you want to work on … what would you like some direction about. Then write that statement down on a piece of paper, fold it up and carry it with you. Several times a day, take it out, look at it and spend some time in quiet meditation or prayer, if you wish. Tune your mind into a state in which you can recognize the answers.
By knowing what you’re looking for, asking the question in the right way and searching for the answer, you will begin to see solutions manifesting around you.
We’ve all gone through something similar to that when we buy a car. A friend of mine bought a Volvo a few years back. The car was on order for a while and during the time he was waiting for it to arrive, he began to notice how many Volvo’s were driving around town. Seemed like everywhere he went he noticed a Volvo. They were at stop signs, restaurant and mall parking lots, on the highways … they were everywhere. And indeed they were everywhere to him … because his mind was focused on them.
This phenomenon occurs because of a basic law of the universe … seek and you will find, knock and the door will be opened to you. When your mind is tilted in a certain direction you will begin to notice things that you never noticed before. You need to put your mind in a certain state in order to find answers to the questions you have. It’s like trying to find a particular station on the radio. You fiddle with the dial a little to find the right frequency. In essence, that’s what we need to do when we are looking for answers or searching for direction. We need to tune our minds to the right frequencies. When we achieve those frequencies we see answers and direction manifesting all around us.
But you need to know what you’re looking for. This involves making conscious decisions about what it is that you’re asking. Asking the question in the right way is as important as the act of asking itself. The universe, of course, can’t answer a question that isn’t asked. But, in the same light, you won’t recognize the answers that manifest around you unless you have asked the question in the right way. That’s because you will be looking for something different.
Sit down with pen and paper. Give some thought to something about which you wish some direction. Let’s take something many people struggle with at some time in their life … their educational goals … what is it they want to do with their life. If your grades are less than stellar, does it mean that you should pursue another course of study? Or does it mean that you need to learn perseverance? What is most needful for you to know at that time? You don’t want to pursue a goal that is not in line with your purpose and that will not be fulfilling to you. But neither do you want to produce grades below your capabilities. What is it that you need help with? Perhaps it’s with bringing clarity to the issue. It might be better to ask for help with that than to ask simply for help with better grades. All difficulties are solved one level higher than their manifestation. When you ask for answers, it may be a good idea to ask for clarity about the issue first.
Figure out what it really is that you want to know … what do you want to work on … what would you like some direction about. Then write that statement down on a piece of paper, fold it up and carry it with you. Several times a day, take it out, look at it and spend some time in quiet meditation or prayer, if you wish. Tune your mind into a state in which you can recognize the answers.
By knowing what you’re looking for, asking the question in the right way and searching for the answer, you will begin to see solutions manifesting around you.
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Accepting Correction
If you accept the tenet that you are where you are in order to learn what you must learn, then you must also acknowledge that you will need to accept some correction along the way. It’s nearly impossible to learn something that’s of any value without receiving instruction and/or correction. How many people do you know who have made their way through their educational experience with all perfect scores?! And the business of living life is much more complicated than any educational process. Making mistakes and learning from them is just part of the stuff of living.
There are fast learners and slow learners. And there are fast learners in one area who are slow learners in another area and vice versa. But everyone has need of correction, mentoring and instruction.
Some folks have a difficult time accepting correction. They may have pride that’s difficult to overcome or they may be defensive toward correction because of their upbringing. That makes it very difficult to accept any kind of advice that may benefit them. And, yet, correction is a critical part of the learning path that can’t be ignored.
I’m a voracious reader. I read a great deal of material that deals with the world’s religions and spiritual traditions. And while I was perusing Proverbs the other night I was absolutely struck with the number of times that the need for correction was mentioned in one form or another. Just a few examples include the following. “Do not resent (God’s) correction … because (S/he) corrects those (S/he) loves. “Correct a wise man and he will love you.” “Whoever ignores correction leads others astray.” “He who hates correction is stupid.” “He who scorns instruction will pay for it.” “Whoever heeds correction is honored.” “Whoever heeds correction shows prudence.” “A mocker resents correction; he will not consult the wise.” “Whoever heeds correction gains understanding.”
There’s some definite themes that run through these sayings and that coincide with other spiritual traditions I have studied. First, correction should not be viewed as something to be evaded or dreaded (“… God corrects who (S/he) loves.”) Of course, you may choose to view correction in a negative way. Or you may choose to view it as an opportunity for growth. We live in a multi-dimensional, quantum universe and, in many respects, you may create from the experience whatever you want. As Aldous Huxley once said, “Experience is not what happens to you; it is what you do with what happens to you.” When you change your interpretation of an event, a change in your reality will also take place. When people correct you it may actually be an act of love. Hear what they have to say and learn to create your own reality from it.
Second, hearing, accepting and integrating constructive correction is a sign of maturity … “… correct a wise man and he will love you.” It shows a willingness for self-examination. There can be no improvement if there is no reflection on your own behaviors, attitudes and beliefs. Consciousness will not be expanded without challenge. We need to push against something in order to grow … much like muscles are developed by lifting weights. Sometimes we are so close to ourselves that we can’t see the forest for the trees. Feedback from those who live, work and play with us can be fresh and insightful. Hearing, sorting through and using the feedback is an act of emotional and spiritual adulthood.
Third, integrating constructive correction reaps benefits – wisdom, honor, understanding, prudence. This is a kind of self-fulfilling prophecy. Once you make the first leap of faith to hear, sort through and integrate construction correction you immediately begin to see benefits. Once you see the benefits, your second leap becomes easier. You build skill after skill, honing them through your knowledge of yourself and feedback from others as you walk your path.
Good mentors walk the circle of life. They both mentor and are mentored. I don’t expect to know as much as those who mentor me and in whom I place my trust. And I expect them to correct me and advise me when I step off my path. It’s only by accepting correction that I can hope to grow.
There are fast learners and slow learners. And there are fast learners in one area who are slow learners in another area and vice versa. But everyone has need of correction, mentoring and instruction.
Some folks have a difficult time accepting correction. They may have pride that’s difficult to overcome or they may be defensive toward correction because of their upbringing. That makes it very difficult to accept any kind of advice that may benefit them. And, yet, correction is a critical part of the learning path that can’t be ignored.
I’m a voracious reader. I read a great deal of material that deals with the world’s religions and spiritual traditions. And while I was perusing Proverbs the other night I was absolutely struck with the number of times that the need for correction was mentioned in one form or another. Just a few examples include the following. “Do not resent (God’s) correction … because (S/he) corrects those (S/he) loves. “Correct a wise man and he will love you.” “Whoever ignores correction leads others astray.” “He who hates correction is stupid.” “He who scorns instruction will pay for it.” “Whoever heeds correction is honored.” “Whoever heeds correction shows prudence.” “A mocker resents correction; he will not consult the wise.” “Whoever heeds correction gains understanding.”
There’s some definite themes that run through these sayings and that coincide with other spiritual traditions I have studied. First, correction should not be viewed as something to be evaded or dreaded (“… God corrects who (S/he) loves.”) Of course, you may choose to view correction in a negative way. Or you may choose to view it as an opportunity for growth. We live in a multi-dimensional, quantum universe and, in many respects, you may create from the experience whatever you want. As Aldous Huxley once said, “Experience is not what happens to you; it is what you do with what happens to you.” When you change your interpretation of an event, a change in your reality will also take place. When people correct you it may actually be an act of love. Hear what they have to say and learn to create your own reality from it.
Second, hearing, accepting and integrating constructive correction is a sign of maturity … “… correct a wise man and he will love you.” It shows a willingness for self-examination. There can be no improvement if there is no reflection on your own behaviors, attitudes and beliefs. Consciousness will not be expanded without challenge. We need to push against something in order to grow … much like muscles are developed by lifting weights. Sometimes we are so close to ourselves that we can’t see the forest for the trees. Feedback from those who live, work and play with us can be fresh and insightful. Hearing, sorting through and using the feedback is an act of emotional and spiritual adulthood.
Third, integrating constructive correction reaps benefits – wisdom, honor, understanding, prudence. This is a kind of self-fulfilling prophecy. Once you make the first leap of faith to hear, sort through and integrate construction correction you immediately begin to see benefits. Once you see the benefits, your second leap becomes easier. You build skill after skill, honing them through your knowledge of yourself and feedback from others as you walk your path.
Good mentors walk the circle of life. They both mentor and are mentored. I don’t expect to know as much as those who mentor me and in whom I place my trust. And I expect them to correct me and advise me when I step off my path. It’s only by accepting correction that I can hope to grow.
Saturday, August 2, 2008
Power vs. Force
It’s easy to confuse power and force. In our society and in the world in general, the two concepts have become so blurred through wrong thinking and rationalization that it often becomes difficult to separate one from the other.
Power is an essence or essential quality of the universe and is reflective of God. It is permeating, infinite, stable and enriching. Force, however, is transient, non-pervasive, and temporary and carries with it an enormous potential for devastation.
A powerful person is grounded, secure in himself, knowledgeable about his place and purpose in the universe and exercises his influence through truth and wisdom. He leads by example and mentors others primarily by walking his talk.
A person dependent on force is unstable, unaware, and motivates others through compulsion. This is a person who would say “it’s my way or the highway.”
A powerful person will be open to new ideas, receptive to new ways of doing things and will project pleasing energies.
A person oriented toward force will maintain a narrow focus, will retain a defense against doing things in any other way than he is used to and will tend to absorb energies rather than project them.
In his book entitled Power vs. Force, Dr. David Hawkins draws some interesting correlations between the practice of kinesiology and consciousness. Based on hundreds of thousands of trials, he assigned numerical values to muscle responses when respondents were asked value related questions. Enlightenment – the highest value – ranged from 600 to 1,000. Courage was rated at 200.
Based on these and other findings, Hawkins made several conclusions including that 85% of the people inhabiting this planet live in the spectrums below 200. Said another way, they function by values that are generally no higher than that of pride.
The scale, however, is based on each numbers individual rate to the 10th power. Therefore, the differences between high and low-end scores are incredible. This gives the 15% of humanity above the 200 line sufficient power to counterbalance those below the 200 line.
Highly evolved individuals may function around the 700 mark and, although there are not many of these people around, each one of them has sufficient power to neutralize or influence to some degree 70 million people who are functioning at the lower levels. Just one person functioning at the 400 mark – the level of advanced reasoning - can compensate for 400,000 people operating below 200. This principle is what allowed figures like Jesus and Gandhi to influence such large segments of the Earth’s population.
Hawkin’s studies are reminiscent of research conducted on Transcendental Meditation which proved that, if less than 1% of the population meditates, significant social change such as substantially lower crime rates can result. They also speak to the power of power as opposed to the force of force.
If we are to survive as a species and preserve this fragile environment we call Earth, we must learn to function from a position of power and not force. That means that our decisions on interpersonal, community and global levels must be made from the context of higher spectrum values such as cooperation and intellect rather than anxiety and animosity.
Power is an essence or essential quality of the universe and is reflective of God. It is permeating, infinite, stable and enriching. Force, however, is transient, non-pervasive, and temporary and carries with it an enormous potential for devastation.
A powerful person is grounded, secure in himself, knowledgeable about his place and purpose in the universe and exercises his influence through truth and wisdom. He leads by example and mentors others primarily by walking his talk.
A person dependent on force is unstable, unaware, and motivates others through compulsion. This is a person who would say “it’s my way or the highway.”
A powerful person will be open to new ideas, receptive to new ways of doing things and will project pleasing energies.
A person oriented toward force will maintain a narrow focus, will retain a defense against doing things in any other way than he is used to and will tend to absorb energies rather than project them.
In his book entitled Power vs. Force, Dr. David Hawkins draws some interesting correlations between the practice of kinesiology and consciousness. Based on hundreds of thousands of trials, he assigned numerical values to muscle responses when respondents were asked value related questions. Enlightenment – the highest value – ranged from 600 to 1,000. Courage was rated at 200.
Based on these and other findings, Hawkins made several conclusions including that 85% of the people inhabiting this planet live in the spectrums below 200. Said another way, they function by values that are generally no higher than that of pride.
The scale, however, is based on each numbers individual rate to the 10th power. Therefore, the differences between high and low-end scores are incredible. This gives the 15% of humanity above the 200 line sufficient power to counterbalance those below the 200 line.
Highly evolved individuals may function around the 700 mark and, although there are not many of these people around, each one of them has sufficient power to neutralize or influence to some degree 70 million people who are functioning at the lower levels. Just one person functioning at the 400 mark – the level of advanced reasoning - can compensate for 400,000 people operating below 200. This principle is what allowed figures like Jesus and Gandhi to influence such large segments of the Earth’s population.
Hawkin’s studies are reminiscent of research conducted on Transcendental Meditation which proved that, if less than 1% of the population meditates, significant social change such as substantially lower crime rates can result. They also speak to the power of power as opposed to the force of force.
If we are to survive as a species and preserve this fragile environment we call Earth, we must learn to function from a position of power and not force. That means that our decisions on interpersonal, community and global levels must be made from the context of higher spectrum values such as cooperation and intellect rather than anxiety and animosity.
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